Single Saints

by **KittyPie** » Sun Dec 09, 2007 10:20 am

I just thought I'd post this question =):

What would your feelings be on dating some one (man) or (woman) who had a disibilty? Like for example some one in a wheel chair? Or some one who is blind? or some one who had mental health problems etc. ?

by **kipluck** » Sun Dec 16, 2007 7:59 pm

It would depends on the person (and their disability). Are their good points worth over looking whatever inconvenience thier disability caused. I have been on a couple dates with a blind guy (and thought it was very funny to call it a blind date.) We did NOT click and I didn't continue dating him. But it wasn't because he was blind. I also had a crush on a VERY hot guy who was in a wheelchair before.

As for Mental Health, that is something I myself struggle with and have had to make a rule that I REALLY need to date someone more stable or at least AS sane as myself. I can't be the more responsible party. SERIOUSLY.

by **Lhene** » Mon Dec 17, 2007 8:35 am

THis question really made me think...but honestly, it depends on someone's view, and definitely on how he feels towards the person, if you like him/here, it doesn't matter, you can surely adjust but if not, it will be hard, you'll surely feel uncomfortable..it is a choice. Honestly, when I was on a mission, our branch mission leader was a cripple, but mind it he's really a great person. H's outlook in life makes him different even from others who are physically normal...

Well, I would say, if I like the person..it doesn't really matter.

by **KittyPie** » Wed Dec 19, 2007 7:18 am

Thanks for the relplys! The reason I ask is because (not that I want anyone to feel sorry for me) =p is that I have mental health issues. I'm diagnosed as Personality Disorder (witch tends to freak peope out when I explain it to them) They usually think I'm going to end up stalking them! lol. Quite the opposite, I'm more likely to just disapear for fear they don't like me. I know I shouldn't be perhaps its satan because I worry a lot about finding the right guy in the LDS church. I think things like oh but he could have a nice girlfirend who doesnt have the problems I've got. It's becoming I real problem for me really. So much so I don't go to YSA activities as much as I used to. I'm going to try harder though as I've been thinking about this all alot. Personality disorder for me is just as part of me. Our trials make us who we are. So I can't really run away from that! Also I strongly believe that when all we see is the problem then that person becomes a problem! I guess a positive way to look at it for me is that I'm blesed because I'm going to have to seek out a super sensitive and tolerant guy! lol! Thanks everyone and hoping your having a good day!

by **kipluck** » Sat Dec 22, 2007 3:04 am

KittyPie, I have Chronic Chemical Depression, OCD, etc. So... yeah... I understand looking for a guy that "gets" me about that, you know?

by **thomasx** » Sun Dec 30, 2007 1:51 am

"Those sensitive, tolerant guys are out there. I promise. And he will be worth searching for."

It's true, there are....let's just hope their spirits don't get crushed by other lds women before they meet the good ones ;)

by **KittyPie** » Tue Jan 01, 2008 1:45 pm

THank you so much for your reply Eyesigh! It is so true. I feel strongly "seek ye first the kingdom of God and all things shall beadded unto you" It's a new year now. I'm going to try to get to more activities and dances and actually open my mouth to people for once! =p (and then not run out the building) I'm 20 now so I'm getting older! I think I need to just follow Heavenly Father and not worry about the rest ! Happy new Year eveyone!

by **shadasie34** » Tue Jan 08, 2008 7:40 am

ok here i go again speaking my mind it would not matter to me bout anyonesdisability if u love someone it wouldn matter thats my own opion but i am a sob for happy romance anyhow

by **Emjay** » Sat Jan 19, 2008 2:03 pm

Let's see... I dated a guy in high school who because of spinabifoda was shorter and yes he could walk, but he often used his wheelchair. After high school, I sort of dated a guy who, unfortunately, has increasing Schizophrenia problems. The guy in the wheelchair--still one of my very best friends. He actually just got married recently. The other guy, I care for him but because of his problems has made it a point to not be friends. (It's hard anyway cause I'm a state away) If he needed anyone though, I'd be there for him.

I don't know if it's just because I grew up around the disabled but it doesn't "turn me off" if people have those "issues." I think what you just need to do (and it appears you are on the right track) is to become as comfortable with yourself as possible and it will all be ok. Besides, you're only 20!!! I'm older than you and haven't had any opportunities in 7 years.. don't worry. You've got time. :)

by **LilMiss_Kiwi** » Tue Jan 22, 2008 4:22 pm

love conquers all, I think if you meet someone and there is the conection between the two of you, then what is wrong with them pysically shouldnt make any differnce.

I think of it this way

If you met a partner with no pyhiscal disablities and then something happens to them where they end up in a wheel chair, or they lose a limb or even their sight or hearing would you continue staying with them, if the answer is Yes then starting a relationship with someone with a disability wouldnt matter.

by **SPark** » Wed Jan 23, 2008 6:32 am

right before I move to Utah I took a girl parilyzed from the waste down to her prom, I honestly didn't even know her, her grandmother asked me to take her.. but turned out she was really nice, and hot too.

Just thought I would share an expierance :)

by **Singer_Kait** » Wed Jan 23, 2008 9:03 pm

Speaking from experience, it can be hard for a person with a disability, sometimes most especially a mental health issue, to be open and honest about their condition for fear of judgement and rejection. I, mylsef, have been open about my disabilities while in a relationship and had my partner head for the hills, so to speak. It has happened more than once and made me sort of gun shy about relationships in general. It's a hard burden to carry.

by **SPark** » Thu Jan 24, 2008 3:54 am

I know what you mean, I think it would be best to get all that out at the start of a relationship, but if you have alot of disabilities you feel like you would be bombarding the person with your problems or something.

Kait, don't let your bad experiances get you down, just be yourself and don't let these things bother you, just be open, if you aren't you will never know if the guy is really right for you.

by **kipluck** » Sun Apr 06, 2008 2:32 pm

"I know the Lord gives us these challenges because He knows we can handle them." Sometimes I really wish the Lord didn't TRUST me quite so much!!!

by **Singer_Kait** » Mon Apr 14, 2008 12:55 pm

I agree. The Lord has an awful lot of faith in lil ole me. I wish He didn't trust me so much either.

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Single Saints

What would your thoughts/feelings be on dating some one with a disability?