Help Me Out Girls

[shadasie34]

well said kittie  heres what it is for me 1. he has to be true to hisprieshood  i look for honesty someone  who i cnsider a friend  first if i cant like im as a friend i cant like him as a husband someone i can laugh with joke with and have a good time with someone i can love and  someone who  isnt so judgemental but i one thing i have to have in a relaionship is the honesty  paula

[drnice]

Regardless of what the ladies may tell you, when you are looking to find lasting love the best thing you can do is be yourself and not try to conform to some imaginary set of average standards, because every individual woman has her own imaginary ideal man that she will tell you she wants, if you can get her to fully disclose her preferences, just like every guy has his own ideal woman.

Who we end up with rarely if ever conforms with our stated objectives. I personally find long dark haired, slender women who are intelligent and "small chested" the most appealing/attractive, however I dated and married a woman who was none of those things and we stayed married for 22 years before she left.

I have concluded that what we as guys, or the women we converse with, say they want has little to do with whom we will actually spend time with and eventually marry. What a woman really wants is a guy with the stones/confidence to approach them, talk to them, ask them out and get to know them. Anything beyond that is just an imaginary ideal that no one can conform to and no one ever actually finds.

Trying to be something you are not to form a relationship, is the worst approach a guy, or girl can take.

[holagatito]

Okay what I look for is just someone who cares. Looks im not too fussed about i usually find something to like about everyone regardless of skin color or weight, like "Hey he has a nice smile or he has a good handshake or something"
everybody says they want "Nice" the problem with that is: Most of the people in the church are nice! but there is always something that distinguishes someone from the flock. Since I'm a recent convert status really doesnt mean much to me like I know it means alot to alot of people. Oh he's an RM! *snatches away* Seriously, i think that behavior is alittle ridiculous, i know RM's are encouraged to seriously date but dating/marrying someone just because they have that status is wrong. You gotta love the person. I couldnt care if whoever i married was a convert or was inactive a few years but thats just me.
I personally think women are too picky! There are alot of nice guys out there who aren't RM's or who haven't been to church in awhile and might even watch sunday football *shock! horror!* Stop being so picky! I know we're taught to choose carefully but seriously the RM you're marrying might not be the right person for you. Why would you wanna be sealed to someone for eternity if he isn't right for you?
alrighty thats all I've got to say

[Ruthlessfairy]

all that loving caring priesthood thing wil never be found if you stuck on hot bod cute smile beach bod n0nsense...i kn0w of many people who run for l0oks and status and end up unhappy...Ladies date the nice guy cos nice grows into royal priesthood nice grows into good father good husband its nice people that make good things happen in church out of church...nice never gets fat it d0esnt get old it doesnt get grey its stil nice to you even tho you mite have g0ne that way...

[dreaminbminor]

What do LDS girls want in a BF/possible husband? And i mean what you ACTUALLY look for , not what you tell people you look for (yes, i know there is a difference, we dont have to play those games here )

I want to marry a sinner. (We are all sinners) But a sinner who wants to improve and become more like Christ and our Heavenly Father, and understands we must repent every day. I think perhaps what the list should be are things we DON'T want in a husband.

*I don't want a control freak.
*I don't want someone who is a lazy pig.
*I don't want someone I have to tell to go look for a job everyday.
*I don't want to marry a liar.
*I don't want to marry a cheater.
*I don't want us to have too many differences in likes and dislikes.
*I don't want an abusive jerk.


I mean I could go on...but you get the drift...and really it doesn't matter what we want, but what we need. We need priesthood holders, we need return missionaries because of their strength in the gospel...etc. We women are weak as well. SO of course we are going to give those things as what we want. But really...we marry who we date...get us on a date and then it's whether or not we click.

[JoiceJoker]

How would you like to have it laid-out? Polite or honest?

[Dusty]

I dunno about everyone else, but in general, I respect and prefer brutal honesty over politeness.

[JoiceJoker]

thomasx

Don´t worry. It gets worse.

I´ve tossed all of the status crap over board. Such as hand baskets as well as RM labels down to distorting mirrors. And did I mention church callings? They´re not a requirement! Besides I don´t stay with someone because I want to be with a specific man but because I can´t do WITHOUT him. (you´ll figure out what that means:-))

And to lay it out precisely – I´m going for the character-trait version.
(oh.....almost forgot.......I need to be attracted to him!)

Reckless?

oh, yeah.

[Alyssa_Rene]

1. An RM
2. A family man
3. Strong church background
4. A cares about our feelings and can emphasize with us
5. Loyal and caring
6. And although girls pretend we don't, we a want a good looking man.

[JoiceJoker]

You're right on the attractiveness!
Although whatever it is that makes a him attractive to her is a variable and depends upon individual taste and preference.
One will simply have to make the move and find out.

[jm0405]

After living in St. George while I attended Dixie College, Cedar City twice, Salt Lake/West Valley once...one common thing the LDS women...make that 2...Return missionary and babies.

[dadood]

WOW this started back in 2007? Where are the rest of the posts from 2007?

But I don't think LDS women are that much different from other women in the world when it comes to mate choice and preference. Sure, they want a good member of the church... along with the usual physical attraction and other signs of fitness (intellectual, social, physical, and etc).

[MerryAnne]

ON the topic of the first post here,

I want a guy who's a worthy temple goer would be if a temple was close and tries to go when he can get there. (RM or not. Some guys were at different places in life and couldn't go, or didn't convert until later in life, or have medical conditions, whatever. If he's Temple-Worthy now, that's what I want.)

Someone who's living as healthy as he can, within reason. Likes to get out and get some fresh air, maybe he rides horses, maybe he plays sports, maybe he has fibro-m. and just likes to sit in the sunshine and think about the world.

Someone who has passions, interests, hobbies. Whether it's dogs and going jogging with his furry friend, or birdwatching, or photography or a favorite sports team, or airplanes or model trains or tabletop wargames. Hobbies make life fun.

Hygiene. I mean maybe he forgets to brush his teeth every once in a while, but keeping a clean house and a clean body is essential. No grimy living. When stuff gets too messy he needs to want to help me clean it, and he's got to floss and clean out his ears and fingernails and that kind of thing. Hygiene is a biggie.

It's kind of a must for me that he either be musical or love to listen to music. Singing, guitar, a collection of good big band songs or a passion for percussion, whatever.

I would like a guy who's observant and thoughtful. I'll remind him about important dates in life, I don't mean that. I mean someone who notices things and ponders them sometimes, who appreciates a beautiful morning, or the curve of a perfect wave, or the way a neighborhood moves and lives.

Personally I'd like a guy with a lively imagination and a love for creativity, because I'm like that myself and we'd mesh better that way.


I don't expect him to "just know what I'm thinking/feeling" or some other kind of girly blather. Guys do not get Psychic Powers just because they love a woman, she still needs to communicate, and I try to do that. If it's my birthday in two weeks, I'll say, "Hey, my birthday is coming up next Tuesday. Let's do something fun that night, like going out for ice cream." If I walk up to you and put my arm around yours and look up at you with big pitiful eyes, odds are I want a hug. I'm a simple and direct sort of person- not very subtle.